Oh there is so much I want to tell you, but I can’t. I’ve decided the keep secret the thing I did in Cork until I return home, but I’m going to create a little interest. This desire I’ve had before and actually did the same thing once before, when I was about twenty or so. However, I lacked the discipline so gave up the pursuit. Now, there I was, going back a forth for half the day, trying to decide if I was going to go through with it or not. It would cost me an additional €110 and make my travels between cities a little more cumbersome. Yet, no matter how much I tried to convince myself that it wasn’t practical or logical, the louder voice kept asking me to define logic. Would ignoring the voice be logical? The older you get the better you know yourself. It doesn’t take as long to make decisions. You know sooner if you’re gonna do something or not. I think I knew I would do it the moment the thought came to mind.
So I did. I really wonder what you guys think I did. I can imagine the things going through your head. I wanna know what you think it is. Seriously, tell me. Let’s make a game of it. If anyone comments and guesses correctly I’ll give in and let you know if you’re right. And this is why I believe my decision was right, for the very next day I received two new bunkmates, two girls from Philly. I asked if either of them had any experience in unsaid subject. I laugh now. Oh, really? Both of you do? Oh and not just that specific subject, but the larger one encompassing it. Of course you do. Of course they did. In all honesty, as soon as they walked in I immediately heard “ask them.” So I did and booyah! It’s almost the only thing we talked about. That and the fact that one of them had spent time in Ireland before and told me where to go and where not to. Thanks Meredith and Delanie!
So Cork is smaller than Dublin and more artistic. It made me think of Asheville or Nashville without hippies. The center of town is mostly tourist shops, but a nice walk. I checked out the University just on the outskirts and took a trip to Foto Park and Kinsale. Those next post. The second to last night I was there I had a dream that I was sitting in an office chair in the upper floors of a tall office building. I was slightly rolling around in the chair and could feel the building swaying ever so gently. I felt the movement increase. Then I knew the building would fall and immediately following that thought I turned my head to the side to look out the window and could see just how much the building leaned. It surprised me to see that it hadn’t snapped at this point, but one more sway and it broke at the bottom, the whole top falling over in one gigantic piece. I sat still in my chair as it rolled across the floor and out the window, which faced the street now. The chair fell away from me and I crashed into the ground. What’s interesting is that through this whole process I remained absolutely calm and collected and recall myself bidding my Heavenly Father receive me into His kingdom. I died in my dream. Then I was alive again, however I was not me, at least not the physical representation of me that I’ve come to be so comfortable with. I was, in fact, a slender and attractive young woman. Huh. So I guess I reincarnated.
When I looked up the symbolism of the dream later (Jen is already doing this) the falling off the building supposedly suggests a falling into unconsciousness. Interesting. If our soul is immortal and our bodies are not and the soul exist after the body then can we say it existed prior to the body? Scripture says so, that we were with the Father in the beginning. There are pieces of scripture where Jesus might say something that makes me wonder about the movement, the coming and going, of the soul. If I ever lived a previous life then I feel very confident now that I lived in a much earlier time of Ireland.